Do yourself a favor and set aside 13 minutes and 36 seconds to listen to this: hygiene tips from Ghostface Killah.

This is just … unbelievably awesome.

I guess this is an audio excerpt from his book The World According to Pretty Toney. Yeah, I didn’t know he had a book either.

Highlights:

“Think of an invention, man. Make a new toilet bowl or somethin’, man.”

“Ya niggas walkin’ around with mad crust in ya eyes and shit. Make sure you clean that shit, man. Nobody wanna see your little rotten-ass face.”

“Brush your teeth and scrub your tongue, man. Scrub your lips, all that shit. … Do somethin’, man. Swallow a box of baking soda and peroxide.”

“For niggas that don’t know how to take showers, wash your face first, then wash your nuts. Don’t wash your nuts, then wash your face. You feel me? You going backwards.”

It goes on. Coupled with the Ghostface Doll, you can really make someone’s holidays special.

(Props to MC Paul Barman for the MySpace blast on this.)